4 Reasons Why You Haven’t Let Go Of The Past
They’re things many of us have a hard time letting go of
For example, a failed career, a broken relationship, a futile marriage.
Things we have a hard time dealing with like loss, death, disappointment.
The list is endless of what life can throw at us at any time.
While so much time may have passed many of us still haven’t moved past certain events
And here are 4 reasons why you haven’t been able to let go of the past yet
1: Because Of What The Past Holds
The past can be a beautiful place to visit, the same past can be a terrible nightmare for some of us.
And the reason why some of us haven’t let go is because of some of the things the past holds.
Things like happiness, dreams, aspirations, memories of events long passed.
For some of us, our past has become a graveyard, a place we constantly visit only to see what we have lost.
My question is! what is it that your past holds? Pain? Betrayal? Disappointment?
Answer this next question truthfully. What is it that you think your future holds?
The past has brought us here for a reason and I don’t think it’s just so we can wallow in it.
Don’t let your past steal from you what the future holds.
2: You Have An Unresolved Conflict You Need To Confront
The past isn’t meant to hold you back but to propel you forward.
We can’t make any difference in our past, and yes! We could have.
But now that it has passed, we no longer can.
What you can do is make that difference today for someday in your future this day will be your past.
What is it in your past that you need to resolve?
The way things ended? The choices you made? How things turned out?
If they are anything you can change in your past, the present is the place to change it.
3: You’re Using It As An Excuse
I have seen this in almost everyone dealing with the past.
Using it as an excuse so people don’t blame them for the future.
Using it as an excuse not to move forward in life.
Because of one failed marriage, or a business that went downhill.
They just don’t want to let go and they have used this as an excuse to block themselves in their insecurities
Maybe so they don’t feel vulnerable.
But we are humans whether we want it or not we will make mistakes.
But it’s not all about the mistakes but how we learn from them.
Not just the regret but how we changed because of it.
How has your past changed you?
Your failures, and disappointment how have you allowed it to change who you are?
All that you have gone through is part of your journey in life.
But this should not stop you from exploring other possibilities.
Many of us live our lives as the snails do.
One taste of the unknown we become scared and hide under our shells.
But really this is not a way to live. We can go ahead in life and explore the world.
No excuse can quantify why you didn’t live your best life.
We can’t keep using our past as an excuse not to move forward.
4: You Still Want To Hold On To The Pain And Sadness
I know how it is, not letting for of the pain and sadness.
We just want to hold on to it, maybe because we now like how it feels and just want to keep feeling that.
Maybe the pain has become so familiar and sweet and we just want to hold on to it.
Similar to like peeling an old wound, we don’t want to let go of that feeling even though it hurts.
But I think it’s time to let go.
Rather than holding on to the sadness and hurts you can choose to hold on to something far more beautiful like happiness, peace, and joy. Hold on to something more graceful like hope, love, and compassion.
Don’t let the past rob you of the joy you can experience now.
5: You Still Don’t Want To Forgive (Bonus)
I know how hard it is to forgive, I’ve had my struggle with it.
Forgiveness goes three ways first, there is you.
Second, there is God or the Universe and lastly, there are those who have offended you.
And in most cases, I have seen the hardest are the first two.
Forgiving yourself and God.
We can’t keep blaming God or the Universe for allowing certain things to happen in our life.
And if we can forgive ourselves enough
This might open the door for us to forgive God and those who have hurt us.
Our unforgiveness cannot change the past but it can sure ruin the future.
Don’t take unforgiveness to your grave, let it go so your past can let you go.
Final Thought
I don’t blame you for what happened in your past, but you will be blamed for what you allow to happen to your future.
I know your journey here has been tough.
We might not be able to forget our past but we can learn to forget how bad they make us feel.
We can let go of the revenge, payback, and the reason is that we can’t hurt others without hurting ourselves.
Carry this new ideal into your future understanding these 3 things
(1) it’s not your end, (2) you can let go (3) you have to move on.
They are no wounds too deep that can’t heal. No joy stolen that cannot be found.
No heart that is broken that can’t be mended.
And on our journey to this new life, we can find the strength to forgive (ourselves and others who may have offended us) find closure from our past and lastly find ourselves and our way back to the present.